Living together before marriage: good or bad


Many marriages fail because of wrong expectations from the
association. Most of the young people enter into marriage
expecting it to be a life long party where the other partner is
the host.

Marriage demands taking responsibility, maturity and mutual
adjustment. But there is no way a young person can perceive
reality and shape his/her expectations accordingly. Dating a
person can give only a partial or distorted picture of things to
be expected.

Now question is: can living together help in this situation.

Staying together with the person one intends to marry without
being legally tied, do help in certain aspects.

Living together can be an excellent opportunity to know each
other, and get a feel of what being together demands and how
being married is different from dating the opposite sex.

If staying together makes the attraction and mutual under-
standing deeper and the participants feel the urge to spend the
rest of their life with each other then they can go ahead and
tie the knot. The decision will be a matured one. And the
marriage will have good chance of success.

But if in case the period of togetherness fails to deepen mutual
love both will be free to go their own way without any bitterness
and legal formalities.
 

Pros and cons of disclosing past sexual experiences to spouse.

Is it wise to disclose one’s pre-marital sexual encounters to
spouse? There is no hard and fast formula for answering this
question. The answer to this problem lies in three critically
important factors.

>Your mental makeup
>Your spouse’s mental makeup
>And social background of both of you

In some societies premarital sex is a taboo and in some
other it is no big deal and yet in some other though it is
not socially approved but that does not mean pre-marital
sex is non-existent there. But what ever it is it is a subject
charged with very delicate emotional energy.

There are certain benefits to have if one decides to disclose
the past experiences frankly.

>Good feeling that comes with being honest with the
partner.
>Absence of fear that the things will be out of control
when he or she comes to know about it from some
other source.

But before starting a free and frank discussion one needs
to be sure the other person can handle the information.
Some person can handle it better than other. And there
are some who pretend that they can take this in their stride
but gets devastated once facts are placed in wide open.

So take some time to understand your husband or wife
before you decide anything. Honesty is a great quality
and has the ability to bring peace of mind and openness
is must between partners in marriage but there is no point
in such openness which you know for sure will destroy
the mental peace of the other person.


Dating and marriage are different games. Ask right
questions before marriage.